you're the one.

heartache

2012-02-12T10:47:00.003-05:00

i miss you. i really do. the next time we meet will be around.. end of june.? it's gonna be a long long time. things always pass pretty slow without you here with me. i cant wait for you to be back. see you in 4 months time baby.

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2012

2012-02-06T11:38:00.017-05:00

my chinese new year in Taiwan :)

we lived at Ximen, 西门町. and it was the crowdest place ive ever seen during the night.

99 刷刷锅. the little steamboat we all watched in the tv.

Paradise Hotel. a very pretty and comfy place we're staying in.

台北车站. a cup of warm coffee is what we all need during the trip.

誠品, Eslite, a place where there's hundred shelves of books that we could spend hours and hours reading.

九份, a historical old street.

台北101，im on the top of whole Taiwan!

and more....... ;)

taipei international airport. flying back. ps: im coming back, taiwan.

just a little pictures to update and telling you guys, my cny rock! :D HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR!

no trust no talk

2012-02-03T11:32:00.002-05:00

all we were saying, were a discussion, and you turned it into a judgement. sorrows. :( no trust, no talk.

ouh

2012-01-16T13:17:00.003-05:00

words cant describe how i feel right now. love, is not abit fun at all. :/

my ma

2012-01-13T07:25:00.003-05:00

hello. anyong ha se yo! it's been around a month of holiday since my last paper for stpm. so, now what have i been doing. i've been chasing korean dramas, taiwan dramas to spend my days-s-s. oh, i often came back and forth to btu to help my mum with her shop. so here am i in btu. ima serious lazy bum. didnt know i can be THAT lazy until i couldnt get myself a job. actually i really did try! had a lot of jobs offer. but, but i just keep reject and say no. due to many unreasonable reasons. i know! sorry! *feel bad. :/

of course, i did contributed a little of my time and energy to help my dearest mum. im glad and dare to say, I DID HELP A LOT! haha. exclude i wake up late every morning. hehe. i can feel, can see and i know how hard my mum had been through to keep up the business and help our family. watching her got tired after a day's work was heartbreaking. so, i did my daughter's part to decrease her burden. i ironed a whole 4 boxes of curtains! sawed those curtain tracks too. i can feel body pain, sore shoulder and feel fatigued. i know my mum's feeling more tired though. you know, whenever i feel tired and wanted to quit, i saw my mum doing her work without any complains, i shut up and keep working. :)

每当我喊累的时候,我看一看我妈不会喊痛的手, 就会很感动很想加油再加油!

Ma, thank you and 爱你！

fighting!

2012-01-08T08:44:00.005-05:00

hey love, all the very super best and you'll do great! God LEADS! <3 keeping you in prayers.

to hold

2012-01-04T02:30:00.003-05:00

life has been pretty good. another day to love you all! <3 kisses.

don ask me please

2012-01-03T02:14:00.000-05:00

when oneself quiet down and think, million thoughts can come through. ugly things started to unfold one by one. things that you shouldnt know, you grab hold of it really tight. suffocated. please dear wen, let go. i wish my brain was like google, yeap, i thought i wanted this the other day. but now, nah. i wish im stupid somehow. or should i say, act dumb wen. i find it ridiculous how people said about not forgetting but let go. i hate that shit. emo much, yeah. :( so, i finally decided that let thou memoriae wins and shut the feelings down option much more applicable.

sweet surprise

2011-12-25T10:35:00.007-05:00

it was a perfect christmas eve. enjoyed shopping with sister michelle in the afternoon. after that, evening, i was getting ready to have a great christmas eve with friends. we went to siamese secret, had a cool dinner and went back to simon's to spend the night and play secret santa. so we waited for the time to strike 12 while playing cards and mahjong. Ee suggest we play killer, police and ambulance. where one have to narrate and others to close their eye and listen. so i closed mine. still thinking of him, who might be busy with studies and stuff. all of a sudden, he popped out! i thought i was dreaming the second i saw you! i was stunned. it was really really times infinity shocking and surprising!i mean like seriously, i never never would have thought you would appear JUST LIKE THAT! zhang yi le! thank you so very much! for creating such sweet memories for me. i'll cherish it much much.it was really sweet of you for planning this. thank you yvonne, and friends too! a lovely christmas i had. love you, awesomely awesome friends and you, baby. and i love Jesus' gift the most. ;) thank You, and happy birthday Jesus.

he flew back!, and celebrated christmas and birthday with me! the feelings within me, was UNDESCRIBABLE HAPPY! :D

happy christmas

2011-12-22T00:51:00.003-05:00

if it wasnt God, i wont have what i had, grace, so far,
if it wasnt God, i wont have such lovely family with much beautiful flaws to polish.
if it wasnt God, i wont have want to change to be more like Him,
if it wasnt God, i wont have so much hope,
if it wasnt God, i wont have amazing life which full of purposes.
if it wasnt God, i wont be clean, forgiven by Him
if it wasnt God, i wont be who i am now, and maybe even better in the future.

people, let us bring back ourselves back to our Lord in this year christmas. rejoice in the Birth of Jesus the Messiah, and thank Him for loving us so much.

have a lovely christmas, with the presence of Jesus Christ.

with much love, wenwen. :)

gleams

2011-12-16T02:10:00.004-05:00

MmmHmm, the taste of freedom! it's gonna be a pleasant month of celebration. i feel relieved, and grateful. im about to commence into another stage of adventure. let oneself rejoice in this long awaited holidays.!

sht

2011-12-11T09:07:00.008-05:00

the fear of you not knowing, not concern. albeit the balance i should make. i cannot not care. if only you can read me.

tambah minyak

2011-12-01T10:27:00.004-05:00

me not happy. look at those eyebags and dark circles!! 4 more papers, 4 more dude.. you'll be regret if you don work hard nawwwwwwww.

15 more days.

24 hour a day, even in 60 seconds,

made a significant difference,

days till 1512, long anticipated.

but somehow, to her dismay.

4 down, 4 more to go,

all in a blink of an eye.

affectionate

2011-11-24T03:44:00.000-05:00

开心, 幸福, 快乐, 感动，

很简单.

我你他和她, 快乐吗?

学会感恩，聆听，感觉.

愿上帝保佑你.

smak

2011-11-15T10:32:00.004-05:00

sitting down and think back,

did you do it when you're able to,

did you cherish while you can,

did you grab it tight when you have it..?

may it be a short and simple texts or sentences, the sincerity counts.

memoirs

2011-11-12T09:42:00.004-05:00

the path have been long and tough

now.. it's coming to an end

with another wiser road need to be taken,

another adventure to start with.

let all that is left here, in our memoirs, are only laughters and fun time.

yeap, she graduated. stpm, pre-U.

ps: sorry guys, im just too lazy to upload one by one.

He loves.

2011-11-11T03:37:00.009-05:00

一辈子的誓言，是他最爱她的一个见证.

tiny bits of here and there.

God loves, so we love. thank God for the wonderful love. :)

happy triple eleven, and wish y'all found your love.

the days

2011-11-10T03:03:00.005-05:00

那一年半，我们一起加油的日子.

wenwen, graduate soon! STPM, fightinggggggggggg!

go away

2011-11-05T01:39:00.002-04:00

the rain,

wash away all sweats and tears.

the wind,

blow away all sorrows and aggrieve.

the thunder,

scare away all distress and misery.

the lightning,

flash away all the ugly truth.

tq

2011-11-02T11:21:00.000-04:00

thank you, so so much. and i miss y'all :)

still

2011-10-29T12:26:00.004-04:00

我珍惜，和你，时时刻刻的幸福.

你每个动作，每个表情，我依然想念，

依然爱你.

cryout

2011-10-26T12:31:00.004-04:00

complicated mind, undescribable feelings, lost for words. you, should learn to, express yourself. :'(

ps: she actually needed you. ....i know, she's tough.

draw me close

2011-10-23T06:41:00.002-04:00

You're all i want.

You're all i've ever needed.

Draw me close to You.

him

2011-10-13T04:34:00.005-04:00

他是我的拐杖三轮车望远镜我的加油站 :)

zero

2011-10-10T10:23:00.010-04:00

nothing special, nothing cool, nothing made the day. only that tiny little heart hopes for some tiny little warmth.

naw

2011-10-08T02:01:00.007-04:00

current addiction.

1. music

2. books

3. conventional textes that keep the heart warm.

the sky

2011-10-05T10:21:00.007-04:00

i love the sky. i was driving back from school in the early noon, while waiting for the traffic, i decided to look up the sky. it was a cloudy day, and i saw a long narrow cloud, which i later googled it up, was called condensation contrail, caused by the plane exhaust or sorts. it reminded me of how i wanted to fly up the sky so much years back. i almost forgot the enthusiasm inside me that i went to plan for this and that just to one day, fly up the enormous sky. the ironic fact is, i did not succeed. and i believe this had been God's answer for a better plan which ive learned that when we are forced to make a choice, our allegiance is to Him. and further, my thoughts went back to when i was a child, primary school. i honestly vaguely remember how i have been when i was in primary school. no doubt, ive been super naughty and of course let's forget the bad part:P recently, an old friend did brought up some memories, that being a prefect in school makes you a prestigious student. unfortunately, im not. which i recall i wasnt meant for prefect anyhow. and how everyone wanted to get on that chair and conduct for the national anthem during assembly. oh not to forget, being a librarian and rule the whole library all by ourselves. i remember we always fight for the rubber stamp to stamp the date instead of finding the cards and putting the books back into the shelves. of course, all these small matters do at least have a bit of tiny impact on what ive become today. knowing what belongs to you will be yours eventually and what is not, you will not get it anyhow. so do things that happened now, wiser or not, richer or not, sociable or not, that's what makes me, me. life's a whole mountain of knowlegde. we'll only learn when our lives' down. at times, w'all do feel aggrieved. but as chinese sayings goes, zuo ren nan, zuo hao ren geng nan. God plays a big part in shaping me, so do you.

ps: i'll reached the sky one day. up and high above, glorify God's name.

SOS

2011-10-04T10:46:00.001-04:00

nose block, sore throat, cough till stomach pain, freezing, no energy, die soon.

battle never ends

2011-09-29T11:46:00.006-04:00

for the coming days, i know things are going to be tough. i somehow felt desolate. no matter how family comfort me, encourage me., how friends brighten up and enlighten my day. the truth is, you're fighting this war alone, all alone....

your daughter's fine

2011-09-27T12:57:00.003-04:00

life is hard, deal with it. day by day, exam's drawing nearer and nearer. i really am straining my every nerve for this killing stpm shit. ive shut down my excitement mode, living a dull and a nerd's life currently. chinese, 闭门修炼. right.. haha. anyway, i need prayers to get through my every study day, i need Him to give me strength and i know in this entire universe, only He meet my needs. you know what's the toughest part in my daily life for now, that is telling myself everything's cool, everything's fine. but the fact is, negative thoughts will come rushing in. overwhelming laziness and other factors that is super saddening. still, i know there are angels all around me, thank God for those who enlighten things up.:) i am still glad, as He answered my prayers, everything's alright till now. in fact, there are times when i am really happy. smiling sincerely and showing off my lovely straight teeth. HAHA

ps: i wanted to say, mummy, daddy, i love you. and your daughter here will JIA YOU JIA YOU for both of you.

says

2011-09-27T12:25:00.002-04:00

boys are dumbhead, they dont understand girls. -anonymous

PS我愛你

2011-09-22T11:25:00.005-04:00

我爱你没有保留

我爱你就到最后

有些人值得等候

有些悲伤值得忍受

ima emokia

2011-09-09T21:41:00.004-04:00

that 10 minutes drive, was the longest drive ever. my heart went from crazy, to tired, and finally found peace. walking off, without turning back, literally crushed the heart. soon enough i realised i was tired, it shouldnt be that heart-breaking i tell myself. i prayed to God, and He says jia you. indeed. i quiet down myself, saying it's alright, everything's extremely fine. you'll be as good as you've been all these while. wiping off the tears, putting a genuine smile on that puffy face and so, i know that's what keeps the heart beating. please do know how much it means and that i know you felt the same way too. :)))))))))))

nais

2011-08-23T08:27:00.005-04:00

here comes the hard part. accepting the fact that i din succeed again. big fat sigh, felt disappointed. anyhow, thank God i still have second chance. which is my last chance. for this last one, i'll definitely give my best out of the best.

this is the sixth day of my holidays. and ive been enjoying it pretty well. prayed that i'll use this hols wisely tho. but seems like ive been a little too relax. while im enjoying, i do note that i don have much time left. time to study, time to go back to school.

mummy and cousin came back miri for raya. i just love how our house full of people and warmth again. when mum's back, everyone will sure be home for dinner, catching up, shopping and eating lots of good food together. and my dear friends, it was a memorable night man. we sing and sing and sing again! it's awesome. up to this day, my holidays have been fun fun and fun!

and spending time, being together with you made me the luckiest girl, darling. :)

random2

2011-08-19T11:19:00.004-04:00

honestly, i felt her disappointment. girl, hear what God and His angels say.. JIA YOU, dearest. :D

3

2011-08-17T11:35:00.009-04:00

i realised, the word love, is insanely a strong word for the old me. i used to avoid saying those words. wanted to keep long and special till the day i found the 'imaginary him'. but now i ask myself, why do i used to be so stingy about saying i love you to those wonderful people around me and missed the chances to tell them how much i appreciate them. God showed us His great love and taught us how to love. so we should love one another sincerely by saying those three great word, i love you. please say it only when you mean it. not just simply blurt those 3 words out. guys, do appreciate when someone finally took up the amazing courage to say that 3 words. like how you would wish to be appreciated when it's your turn. but but, there are always a but, arent they.:) we definitely don know about forever, what more to say, true love people. remember that, never commit to your bf, gf for forever when you dont even have the ability to do so. say true love only till the day when God say YES!

i know this may sound cheesy but, i love you my friends. esp, x-mates! i love y'all. i sincerely love my awesome family. and you, i love you most dearest. ;) you know who you are. and lastly, true love, i love you dear God.

亲爱的

2011-08-14T08:31:00.008-04:00

不管是谁爱谁比较多，不管未来如何，我只想好好的爱你。:)

such is life

2011-08-13T13:16:00.005-04:00

it started off with a very sweet and pleasing moment, then the next second, it turned sour. the moment when you were raised high up and were thrilled, but was thrown back down and smash hard on the ground. ouch, have you ever experienced that? at that particular moment, my heart sank. bad things happen when you have not even enjoy enough that something good. so much of highs and lows in life. can things be any easier? can human be more guileless? i doubt.

2011-08-12T12:09:00.001-04:00

life is hard, deal with it. day by day, exam's drawing nearer and nearer. i really am straining my every nerve for this killing stpm shit. ive shut down my excitement mode, living a dull and a nerd's life currently. chinese, 闭门修炼. right.. haha. anyway, i need prayers to get through my every study day, i need Him to give me strength and i know in this entire universe, only He meet my needs. you know what's toughest part in my daily life for now, telling myself everything's cool, everything's fine. but the fact is, negative thoughts will come rushing in. overwhelming laziness and other factors that is super saddening. still, i know angels are all around me, thank God for those who enlighten things up.:) i am still glad, as He answered my prayers, everything's alright till now. in fact, there are times when i am really happy. smiling sincerely and showing off my lovely straight teeth. HAHA

ps: i wanted to say, mummy, daddy, i love you. and your daughter here will JIA YOU JIA YOU for both of you.

erase

2011-08-07T03:56:00.003-04:00

i once was such a happy kiddo. :)

random

2011-08-05T02:22:00.005-04:00

am i stupid?! or you just took me for granted. yeap, i think i am.. you're a freaking dumbass, wenwen. :'(

my man

2011-07-29T12:10:00.005-04:00

the guy who loves me. :P

slap me

2011-07-23T03:11:00.004-04:00

things arent perfect as it seems. i got mad, extremely angry at what happened. but what can i do? pause, breath, and smile. hell, it's devastating. cant we for one second, stop being a people pleaser? ya know what's a people pleaser? those people that's having trouble to say no. for them, saying yes has became a habit, putting everyone else before themselves. come on, realize something, you have a choice! stop being a coward and speak out. you worry too much on how others will view you. you know what's the most important thing? that is how God will view you. i know you'll never be those who shout out and get out of control out of nowhere. you'll stay 'pause, breath and smile' like how you've been all along. remember that, that is the moment when God smile.

so dear all, did you smile today? :)

heart

2011-07-18T05:39:00.009-04:00

dear love. i miss you, even if we're only about 8 km apart. maybe? more or less. haha i miss you, even if we just met yesterday. i miss you, even while im texting you. and im happy when im thinking about you. ya know, Angel tells me you'll know that im here missing you. i once heard, love needs a lifetime to be proven. i would. i'd love you if i'd love till the end. i'd wanna grow old with you. God, i know it must be him. cause me together with him., cant survive without You. <3(:

haha

2011-07-05T10:56:00.003-04:00

a smile a day, keeps sadness away.

cold

2011-07-04T10:22:00.002-04:00

am in love with the current weather, current mood. cool breeze cold night, listening to the only sound in the room, Beyonce Knowles-Listen. ahh, a very relaxing night. been having a pretty good day as well. *GRINS* :) not a single thoughts are on my mind. how cool is that. not thinking what did i do, not bothering what's happening, and not wondering what's next. yeahh, we should just do these sometimes do we.. enjoy the relaxing moment, let everything just the way they are. we just don need to know everything, grab hold on everything, and over-busy on everything. and now, what i wanna do is lay in my comfy bed, pray and shut down. night peeps. :)

19

2011-07-01T03:08:00.003-04:00

happy birthday dear sooee!

i feel bad for not being there with you every birthday since i cant remember when, form 3? not buying you cakes and present, sing you a birthday song and watch you make your wish. it's been so long right? but you were always here when it was my birthday! it was always on the month when you were back in miri and you always bought me something! i appreciate everything! ;) i miss old times! i miss you! when can we celebrate your birthday together again?! i felt extremely guilty now. T.T i guess, it'll never be the same anymore. we've all grew up, not sticking to each other like old times anymore. haha! but i do know you had great and blessed birthdays throughout these few years and i do hope you enjoy today as well! ENJOY big big your day and your friend here sincerely wish you all the best and have a blessed one ee!

love, wenwen.:)

i care

2011-06-17T22:59:00.003-04:00

i guess everyone has got their problems, everyone is fighting their own battle. so do i. but am i certain the battle that im fighting for? i often heard people saying, i dont wanna grow up, full of unexpectation and troubles. but i would think, why? perhaps we don wanna face or don like the uncertainty that's unfolding in front of us. all those premature feelings and thoughts is so so confusing. but im certain, i dont wanna go back, dont wanna turn back time. i wanna discover and unfold God's plan for me. and i believe it's the best.

dear friends, we've got many many problems, but remember we're here for each other. a problem shared is a problem halved. no matter how much we miss the time where were young and problems-free, we still got each other today.

ps: 'trust is like a crumpled paper, once it's crumpled, it cant never be perfect.' i wish and hope this was not true :)

not cool

2011-06-03T10:32:00.004-04:00

a week of holidays has passed, PASSED and WHAT HAVE I DONE? nothing! i really did nothing cool this week. i did not really study, i did not revise, did not do stuff i intended to do! i slack, play and laze around. gosh, so not cool. :( i really should gear up for stuff. there's stuff to do for church, studies and tuition. there are books ready for me to read, many many other beneficial stuff that i can do, but i just do not have the initiative to do it. why?? oh whyy.. maybe i just gotta chill, relax, it's holidayss! enjoyyyyyyyyy! reallyy?? :/

if

2011-05-29T07:55:00.003-04:00

have you ever ask yourself these questions?

if one day, you disappear from your group of friends, will their lives change?

if one day, you disappear from your workplace, will that surroundings change?

if one day, you disappear from your school, will the environment in your class change?

try and think of it, if you disappear, what will the world around you become?

if the world around you turn peace and harmony when you're gone, then me and you should try and find our faults, and self-criticise those daily complaints, arguments, criticism and bad behaviour.

if the world around you doesnt have even that one slight change, then it's like it doesnt matter at all, cause you didnt shine.

if the world around you turn bad when you left, then our existence do bring and becomes ppl's blessing.

let ourselves become others' blessing!. need not to perform any miraculous job or do any amazing success. live only happily, peacefully and with a warmhearted self you can make the world around you a better place.

if one day, what will the world become if you're gone? is definitely worth thinking with a modest heart.

do you?

2011-04-22T22:49:00.006-04:00

who cares about the past? why do you care? so what if you kept thinking about the past? the past is the past, let bygones be bygones. yeap, true. but heyy, do you really really, deep down in your heart, sincerely do not feel interested or concerned about it. yeah, maybe for some people. still, some other people might not think so. a friend of mine told me, the feeling of anxiety to know how he or she felt in the past, makes them wanna know more and more. eventhough the truth is ugly or make the whole thing sounds like a lie. in the end, all they had is feeling depressed and struggle between the truth and the false. sad isnt it? also some people might respond by 'yeahlaa! so why kepo kepo go find out?!' you certainly will feel more delighted by not knowing what's true and not. you will have no idea what have happened and even better, cherish the present. and this is what all of us are looking for no? hold on to now, and accomplish today. looks like ive come to a conclusion myself which is not to feel concern about what has been the history rather than feeling dull and gloomy about the past. and yeap co-called MOVE ON, my friend. :P

and guess what, after i told her these, she gave me a final answer, 'alright, not to care okayla, but that DOESNT MEAN I DON MIND kay!!'

hahahahaha, the end.

high.low.big.small

2011-04-10T00:03:00.005-04:00

i comprehended about 4 different behaviours and attitudes to treat people and deal with stuff around us in this world these day. that is aim a little higher, having a low profile, big-hearted (magnanimous you would call it) and little mouth.

we gotta set our goals a little higher. (but not too much) which definitely would bring challenges and hardships and only through this way that we'll learn. if the ability of doing things reached 70% for example we gotta try to aim for 80%. it will make us feel weary of course but the process of learning will eventually make us grow. when we stop at the place where we're capable of and comfortable with, we would not have done something better. but that doesnt mean to be proud or arrogant. for when ego comes, so do shame. people will not look you as successful but worse, feel ashamed for you. no one will pay any respect and even feel disgusted for you're just a person who act to have a high status. being greathearted and generous will definitely bring advantages not only for other ppl, but also to ourselves. having hatred in ourselves, despise a person, jealousy can really make one's life so so miserable. after all the struggling and conflicts. the moment you learn how to forgive and forget, you would just wanna tell the whole world that thanks to You i do not care anymore. cause you realised the heavy, useless burden that you've been carried for so long is pointless. no one will feel pity on you because it's you yourself that don wanna let it go. there's a few 'dont's' that i did often. =.= don interrupt, don gossip, don say what has not been proved, don show your vulnerability easily to ppl who cannot be trusted. your lil mouth actually can tell what a person you are so sometimes, shut that lil mouth of yours in some situation do bring you benefits. ;)

some point of view from me after i read an article written by 施以诺, a committed christian and a great writer. :)

him

2011-03-17T09:39:00.004-04:00

thinking back it has been more or less five months now, where the story just started out of nowhere. it is just 159 days. 159 days out of thousands days, life has turned real different since the day he came into my life, the moment i opened up my heart to let him in and our lives being together. ive been so happy and content. things are not gonna go easy, but i do know we can make it through. the fact that he's miles away, where i cant be there whenever he needs me the most broke my heart. you take good care baby, and heyy, i miss you. :')

run

2011-03-15T02:58:00.008-04:00

ahah, found this particular picture super cute! :P

yeap, finally i cut my hair! ive been keeping my hair super long and not willing to cut it eversince. now, medium length but definitely is short for me cause it's like half of my hair's gone!! LOL.

oh guys, it's holidays for meee! :D one short week but yeah, it's more than enough to release the tension and stress that ive been going through. but hell, time is way faster than i thought. day after day, and everything is just happening so fast! well, im not going to slow down also. gotta RUN! in full speed! hah!

up till now, i still have no idea how to spend my holidays, definitely not gonna waste any minute any second for 'MASA ITU EMAS'! lol.

people suggesting catching up dramas when it's the time for hols but i don know why and since when i felt like watching drama is kind of a waste of time. i know, there's plenty of nice and great dramas out there where everyone is discussing who and who, where and why, how and stuff. but i guess i really don have the time to catch up episode by episode sitting in front of the laptop for almost a day and even in the middle of the night, drooling over cute guys and girls in the drama. NO OFFENSE to all drama lovers but i myself are lacking the enthusiasm and pleasure to watch dramas again.

anyhow, anywho, i did spend my time watching movie instead! which only requires one and a half hour or more? two. :P but thenn,. im having trouble in choosing the movie that is worth watching! :O haha i know, im a choosy one. so yeah, for the coming days, i would wanna watch a few GOOD movies and do some revision of course and gotta 面壁思过 for all the red marks in paper. T.T

doubts no more

2011-02-21T04:03:00.004-05:00

stpm results' out! nah, not mine. lol. ive been thinking by the end of this year, i have to go all over back to history, where i'll feel the intense again, sleepless nights to do revision, taking up as much tuition as possible. and on that particular day. sweat's dripping, hand's shaking, leg's shaking, feel cold, dry mouth, heart racing moment. so fast so fast that i bet this time i'll forget how to breath at the moment i see the result. then, burst out tears!!! haha sorry, im exaggerating. :P

few months left, have not yet experience the hardest part though. but i know God knows me better than i do. He know im capable of doing this. i know i have yet many many other adventures to start. i know this is one of the part that i wouldnt wanna lose and leave out. i finally knew it.

喜欢

2011-02-19T05:36:00.005-05:00

原来, 是这样的一个感觉.

心痛, 到快要爆炸了.

为什么呢, 是太小心眼了吗?

或许, 以为只有加分，没有扣分,

是完美的.

哇, 真的好不好受哦...:(

心里明明就已经原谅了,

但心痛的感觉仍然还在.

是该学会包容的时候了. :)

不要去想了了了了!

i still cant help but missing you. :/

heyy

2011-02-17T23:18:00.003-05:00

hey,, so fast. feb is about to come to an end. here comes March, where exam's drawing nearer and nearer. i feel kinda sad for the past few days. back to my secondary school life upper six we named it, had been miserable. looking at my friends stepping their foot into degree holder, some even in their second year! gosh, i felt so left out. cause im still in my PRE-U! nevermind wen, it's okay. haha at least im not wasting my time doing nothing right. :) im making an effort for my future as welll! :D nevertheless, i'm going to enjoy the last year yesh i bet it's the very last year man! lol of all these. joining gerko, performing stuff, staying back after school, sports day, tuition and yeah more and more.

but you know, i have everything around me. which i am very very the grateful of. :) thank God. i realised how vulnerable i was when im alone. guess everyone feel the same way when they're by themselves. things can change so quickly and fast within a second. stuff i thought would remain had gone, people that i hope to stay, left. but guess it doesnt matter, cause i know y'all are with me me me.. :)

ps: this sentence slapped me in the face. =.= 'there's a lot of more beneficial stuff that we can do besides blogging' but heyy, no doubt blogging is a way to halt memories! :P

c.n.y

2011-01-31T13:03:00.009-05:00

dear bloggie bloggie. ive dumped you here for really quite a long time. time flies man! ITS CHINESE NEW YEAR! so called rabbit year! i remember i was sitting here in the same room, the same place, using the same laptop wishing everyone a new 2011 year and now another month had just flew past me *SNAP* just like that. hah hah. so how do i survive january.? study study and more study. haha. but not really. :P i went around with my really great friends and hang around with them. it was the greatest thing for the month.

then, how was i going to start my feb. CNY of course. i will be going back to btu (AS ALWAYS) for my awesome family reunion dinner. then we'll be heading to the cat city, kuching. for fun i guess. visit a few of my dad's relatives maybe? but all i wanna do is shop, eat and shop and more angpaoosss.! ;) though im still not feeling the heat for cny, i really do hope i'll have a great cny celebration.

gotta say sorry to him. who actually wants me to stay. but i cant. :( but we'll meet again when im back! sorry i cannot accompany you throughout cny. but i'm sure you gonna have lotsa lotsa fun with your family and friends. :) and also, FRIENDS, sorry for not being here. cant go tuan bai.! and alot of you guys went back to your study place when im back in miri. hmm.. SAD CASE! :( ENJOY your cny to the fullest dear friends! :)

but anyway! CNY's HERE!!! 在这里祝大家新年蒙恩!新年快了乐!

new shit

2011-01-06T08:40:00.003-05:00

2011, a brand new year and yet i feel nothing new about it. i'm back to my secondary school life, back to where i would just stay at home and study! guess it'll be my new year resolution? i've had so much fun for the past holidays and now, i have to turn my life upside down. study has already become my first priority and no longer was an option. anyhow, no worries. little girl here is doing pretty fine. :) so let me get this chance to say i cant THANK YOU all enough! my dearest friends and family for all the great and awesome moments. i'm so blessed to have you guys. and also SORRY! if i had offended anyone. truly and sincerely asking for apology. we'll make 2011 a better year peeps!

Love, wen.

emp

2010-12-28T10:03:00.008-05:00

awesome people, great birthday, amazing day.

i had the greatest birthday this year, 2010 the year i turned 18. a step more closer into

the adult world.

1227, i had fun!, enjoyed every moment being with him. ahh, wenwen day was super awesome! :) went to his house in the early noon, and loving the moment when he surprised me with those pretty pretty flowers. to the beach after that then bumped into ee and her boy! what a surprise, ee! :P we went to marina and back to his house and call it a day, full of sweetest time. oh, i cannot forget the time when we sat on the staircase feeding you a whole lump of cake. haha! it was indeed an amazing moment. x) he gave me a cute bracelet for my 18th. he truly is the best, and you're the greatest gift.

of course, my super great friends. your presents, cake and wishes lighten up my day. thanks for remembering and you guys are just super cool. :) i don think i'll be meeting you guys again in a while. so lets enjoy the time we have here and i love y'all!

not to forget my dad, love you and thanks dad! i definitely grew up! haha though i still heard many comments saying 'wenwen still xiao hai zi laa! :D' hmph! i'll prove you guys wrong! :P

last but not least, i wanna thank God. it's truly a blessing from God to have y'all. mwah! love you, Father.

ugh!

2010-12-22T13:04:00.005-05:00

the heck?! i cant sleep..! many stuff went through my mind and i really gotta stop thinking before im going insane. this is crazy man, it's 2.41 in the morning..! where i should be dreaming happily and SLEEPING. instead, i'm battling hard with my mind (i lose), went to the toilet TWICE in an hour time, == and now here, trying to clear my head out, breathing in and out, making myself as sleepy as possible. i don even dare to look in the mirror, my eyebags and dark circles are getting real worse. dang! yesh, insomnia it is.

oh! i yawned. finally, after browsing around through the net for i cant remember how long, i finally sense some sleepiness. please pretty please pray that the moment i shut down, i can have a good night sleep. night peeps.

another day has gone.

2010-12-02T20:51:00.003-05:00

1, 2, 3.. 3 dec. i've no idea since when, i started to count the day that goes by. day after day, starting to pass by real fast.. the month of celebrating has just begin, but i felt like it's about to end! why oh why.. what if i'm already getting used to all these.. being with him, waking up at whatever time i want, doing whatever things i like (study of course!:P). somehow, i just wish things could go more slowly.. bit by bit. what if what if.... what if.

Serving In Mission

2010-11-27T21:03:00.009-05:00

hey there! i came back from a mission camp for 5 days and 4 nights in Sibu last few days. it was awesome! let me just talk a little on what the camp is about. 三邦走向万邦 is the camp's title, which means two of our states, sarawak and sabah with brunei walk towards and reach out to the far corners of the world. this camp was organised by SIM East Asia, a community of God's people who worship Him and passionate about the Gospel, seeking to fulfill the mission of Jesus Christ in this world. so here was i, at the amazing and beautiful church in Sibu, 福源堂 Masland Church listening to great preacher, giving us full idea on what a missionary is working on.

5 days 4 nights in Sibu really bring me a whole lot of new experiences, with many ups and downs. i get to take part in the drama, a small tiny part. :) it's about all the missionaries who did a really great job in Sibu. and i get to eat many nice food! met a bunch of great friends and good thing was, i get to quiet down myself and just listen to Him. the worst thing was i lived in a really bad inn. really bad! i din complained much about it, cause at least i din see any cockcroach saying hello in my room and din smell anything bad. at least. :(

overall it was an awesome trip. i stopped at bintulu instead of miri, come back to my dearest mum and relatives. :)

we got a problem.

2010-11-18T21:49:00.005-05:00

i bet everyone has the time when you feel like crying, burst into tears that you've been kept for so long.. but i just cant. tears would not just roll down my cheeks when i wanted to. hm, i wonder why. and when was the last time i cried.?! must be ages ago.. during spm? hah, no clue. holding back tears is something i always do nowadays. i no longer say things i wanna say. but, that doesnt mean you can take me for granted. so please, don bullshit me. :]

ps. 720530 :P

move it.

2010-11-07T08:56:00.012-05:00

i laze around the house for the past few days since exam's ended. not doing anymore studying nor revising back my freaking stupid test papers. and just when i started to feel guilty and wanted to do some math, phone rings, dad calling, bro making noises... and the state of being distracted brought me back to square one. :( booo, what a loser.. but but, i promise, PROMISE definitely will be doing revision during holidays. :P oh, and i got to catch up with some old friends last week. it was cool seeing them back and having them around again. :)

she miss her boy. ;)

year end

2010-11-04T09:24:00.004-04:00

fuh, what can i say. im whacked! two weeks of exam and study were finally over, for now. i was worn out man. somehow i'm still not convinced as the saying goes 'genius is 1% inspiration and 99% hard work' am i not working hard enough? i wonder. cause stress definitely do enhance my ability to cope better under pressure but i can go super intense and it's overwhelming if it goes beyond one's control. so breath wen, BREATH! you're about to become a nerd! anywayy, it's holiday! not literally but yesh! no homework and no school for the next half and a month time! starting from 20 nov onwards until two o one one! ooh lala.

but i got no plan for my hols.! but but, my boy is coming back! i miss him a lot. heh. ;) and friends who studying abroad is coming home for hols as well! we're so gonna have fun fun and FUN. oh and i totally forgot i'm going for the Youth Mission Conference in Sibu! from 23 till 26 nov. can't wait! or maybe after that i'll go back btu for a week or so. maybe. and most importantly i have to spend some time revising back all the subjects.! so that i would not be wenNOOB the next year. :D so happy holidays peeps!

cause i believe.

2010-10-28T03:28:00.003-04:00

nothing matters when im with you.

help.

2010-10-22T05:30:00.004-04:00

gosh,! i cant breath! it's choking me alive. am i not doing the right thing? the words that i speak, the things that i do,. was it wrong?! i know You said it's not going to be simple. but every single words that came out of their mouth, i felt as though thousands of needles were stabbing into my body, etching deep into my heart, and till it broke. into pieces that hardly mendable. accusation is simply inevitable. i need help, i need You.

,

2010-10-20T11:42:00.003-04:00

i found this. it feels like it's been ages. but nah, it's only a few months back.

wenwen's world is no longer hers alone.

cause you just walked out of one of her dreams.

you have to take the responsibility for that! :P

triple ten, the story begins..

let's not put a fullstop on it.

you leave me breathless.

teen angel2

2010-10-16T10:10:00.002-04:00

Scene 2

(Rick is already in the kopitiam)

Peggy: Oh! you're alive!!

Rick: Of course i'm alive but who are you??

Peggy: uh? Sorry, wrong person.

(Peggy finds herself a table and sits down)

Kate: (walks to Peggy's table and looks at Rick sitting alone) Hey, you know that guy over there?

Peggy: Yes, uhh, i mean no. i dont know him

Kate: You look familiar, have i seen you around somewhere.

Peggy: No, i don think so. I'm new in town. So, who is Rick?

Kate: Only the cutest boy in school.

Peggy: You like him.

Kate: Of course. Every girl does

Peggy: So he's not your boyfriend.?

Kate: (laughs) No, he doesnt even know I exist. Can i get you something? I assume that's why you came here.

Peggy: Yeah, i'll have a teh C peng..

Kate: One teh c peng coming right up!

Rick: (cries face down) Peggy, how can i ever forget you?

Kate: Are you alright, Rick?

(Heather, an obnoxious teen who continually picks on Kate enters with her friends with a loud bang! Everyone look at them)

Heather: Why are you talking with Rick?

Kate: Can i get you something? We're closing soon.

Heather: I know you've got it bad for him (knocks some cups on the floor)

Kate: I just cleaned the floor.

Heather: Oh dear, clumsy me.

(Ricks stands up and beat her friends up, Peggy stands up as well, to stop the fight)

David: (appears) STOP! (everyone paused)

Peggy: (turns her head) what happened to them?! who are you?!

David:(David enters and is wearing a black outfit) I'm David. I'm here to.. guide you.

Peggy: You were sent to help me?

David: You could say tat. These mission can be hard., especially when you are new. A helping hand is often appreciated. Stand aside! and watch. START! (Heather's scene played again)

to be continue.. references:freedrama.net

teen angel

2010-10-15T10:37:00.002-04:00

Title: Teen Angel

The Cast

Peggy(wen): a teen who has found herself in a mission after her death

Gabriel(alex): the guide upon stairway to heaven

Kate(wilson): shy teen who is in love with Rick

Rick(loung): a teen who has lost his girlfriend in a car accident

David(chai): devil who misleads Peggy

Scene 1

At 2010 Kopitiam

(a track of cars racing, crashing, pulse oximeter)

[Lights come up to Peggy, a young teenage girl looking worried, standing before a golden staircase leading through a cloudy background. Gabriel, a man in white is at the top of the stairs.]

Peggy: Rick! Rick! where are you?! what happened?! oh the last thing i remembered was... the.. ACCIDENT!!

Gabriel appears

Peggy: Who are you?!

Gabriel: I'm Gabriel. I see you've arrived. You were in a coma for a month. I almost thought you were going to make it. Modern medicine certainly creates a lot of uncertainty in my work these days.

Peggy: Where am I?

Gabriel: You're climbing the stairway to heaven.

Peggy: (Shocked) I'm dead!?

Gabriel: You could say that. I was sent to guide you.

Peggy: Guide me? Into heaven? The way looks pretty clear. (pointing to stairs)

Gabriel: It appears so, but nothing is ever as simple as it seems ( motions to the stairs) Perhaps i should illustrate, try going up the stairs.

Peggy: (heads to the stairs, stops at the step and cant seem to go further) I.. I want to, but i cant.

Gabriel: That shows you're not ready yet.

Peggy: That doesnt mean that um, i'm going err, you know where..

Gabriel: Fortunately no, you've lived a good life and have a few blotches on your record. You shouldnt fear going anywhere but heaven. but.... there's always a 'but' isnt there? you will need to earn your wings

Peggy: Earn my wings? what do i need to do to earn my wings?

Gabriel: There is some unfinished business in your past life that must be resolved. You will appear as a stranger to those who once knew you. Discover the problems and fix it. That will earn you your wings

Peggy: What? What problem? How am i going to solve this? Ugh, i have a feeling this isnt going to be as easy as it seems.

Scene 1 end. to be continue... references:freedrama.net

you.

2010-09-24T23:06:00.003-04:00

now it seems so far away, it was once our dream. sometimes i feel the blank wall between us. i dont know what's on your mind. but sometimes, it feels like you're just right here. how i wish i'm able to read your minds. cause i'm curious of what goes in and out. do let me in sometimes..? i know it may sound a lil selfish. please dont give up on her.? but there's a thought bothering me, what if our assumption are coming true. i do not dare to think of it, cause she's a coward in losing you.

灯笼节

2010-09-23T10:01:00.003-04:00

happy tang lung's day! 灯笼节快乐!

hols

2010-09-10T11:17:00.003-04:00

DS 3

2010-09-05T08:29:00.005-04:00

woohoo! DS concert has finally come to end. we shall not complain how the tickets sold, faults that we did on stage, and bad makeups and hairdo. cause thank God everything runs smoothly throughout the whole night. :) we had fun, had a blast for all of us who performed really did our best and enjoyed dancing the night away. these memories shall be kept, and be reminded that we worked hard to make the night rock!

before.

first night.

second night with zombie!

1227

2010-08-27T11:57:00.007-04:00

having a lil trauma after what had happened. there's a word saying it is better to be safe than sorry. so true. actually i got into a car accident yesterday, it wasnt that bad, im still alive. so, i let my dad settled all the stuff, and yeap so 1227 is taking MC.

and recently, ive went to bakong for a church mission trip. me, sui mei, della and other church members were giving tuition to bakong iscf's form 3 and form 5 students. the journey from miri to bakong took one hour and a half. plus the road is so bumpy. got really exhausted after the day. but this had really given us a whole new experience. the students there are really attentive and nice. most of them are natives. so, they would ask questions and pay full attention to you when you're teaching 'em. i feel kinda bad tho, since im not a professional so i cant teach much about science for art stream. there were only one session for physics class and i hope i did gave them some idea on scoring paper 3. hopefully... XD

stuff

2010-08-19T11:32:00.008-04:00

i found another 'wen' plat number..! :D

funny stuff happened! one day, as usual i went to school without name tag, when i was on my way to canteen. i get caught by pk hem! == she asked a lot, my name, my class, why i din wear name tag and stuff. and then ho ive been called to her office, got lectured and gave me a so-called temporary name tag.

and yes, this is it. a piece of paper with a few inks and chop on it. clipped to my pocket using stapler! i was dumbfounded. == fine, i got a brand new different name tag from others for the day.

my middle parting. success?? but i think im gonna cut it anyway..? :D

good job.

2010-07-30T05:35:00.004-04:00

i finally said it! like yes!, im doing it!! this is such a great great news. it's been bothering me for a long long time. and it really takes a lot of courage for me to do so, maybe it meant nothing like 'ceh! normal thing!' for some people, but for me, it was such a great step closer to Him. yeeap, i really would like hear, 'im happy for ya!' :) thank you.

and recently, im living a hectic life, ive been doing lower six for about two months now. started to go for tuitions, school, study and blah. uhhuh and exam is in a week time! pray for me pretty please. up till now, im trying my very best to cope up with all the subjects. doing revision whenever i can, cause ahh, i can be quite lazy at times. == you have no idea how thick and thick and thick form 6 reference book is. okay, maybe im exaggerating a lil bit, but seriously no kidding. lol the school was okay, i met great teachers, good friends and did i mentioned im the only girl in my physics class.? which had seriously been bothering me since the first day of class. it was alright now, we get along pretty well.. and it'll eventually get better. :)

another thing, i went back dancing. there's a concert coming up! so, schedule's packed with practices also. all the infos is in the poster. :) guys and girls out there, grab a ticket early, and you'll get a nice seat!

what i have become.

2010-07-11T03:26:00.005-04:00

life happens, and you move on. i know know. ive heard this a thousand million times. well, when you slow down your pace and look around you, is this for real? it all seems unreal to me. that i am now going through this and that. life's unpredictable. you never know what's gonna happen the next second. i should be glad with all these. i should be grateful! and i thought i am. but for one second, just for a second, how i wish things would stop at that moment where i was laughing out loud, smiling from the bottom of my heart. but then, yeah, this is life. and im trying my best to enjoy every bit of it. every chapter, every memory of these should be stored. until the time when you think back on how you see all these, you would realised how paranoid you have been. i can't believe i nearly forgot what life is like. we should just put on a charming smile on our face and live like you never lived before.

C.O

2010-07-09T05:21:00.005-04:00

you said you wanna start over! you said you want it. you promised! why do you break all the promises that you had make! you know what, it's your problem! please! stop blaming the others. it is YOU! who make this mess up! you're pulling yourself away! far far away... i don get it, what the heck is wrong with you..

O God.., pull me back.

the very first day.

2010-06-21T09:37:00.006-04:00

it all started with a bad bad parking place. luckily i met chai at the front gate, and he brought me in. the very first thing i did in smk baru. picking up rubbish around the school. == ive no idea what is it called. 'something kerja.' we had to do that while the other student assemble in front of the school. but this gave me a chances to walk around the school. i met a few new friends, some ex-st joes, ex-wiras and watis. a few new friends brought me to class, cause ive no idea where chai had gone. fuh.. the classroom is very the small lo. and there's not many of us, around 10+ so i sat the front table but the teacher drive me away since it's her table. T.T so i have to sit with a guy, the second row. and i heard many of the students are transferring. so there's not gonna have many students left. honestly, i am not familiar with all this. not at all. the class, the environment, the school. although i knew it was the exact same thing like secondary school. but.. but, i don know.. i felt strange. as in, do i really belong here? it all went well until math. lotsa things to catch up. have to bring back all the form 5 math's memory. PA was alright as well. chemistry was okay because i went to tuition before, so i roughly know how about it. the headache part was math. a lot of brainstorming stuff. huhh.. and so this is how im gonna be for the next two years. lower six in smk baru. a student with uniforms again!! a different one:)

YSD 3rd level

2010-06-04T00:45:00.011-04:00

i received mail from yayasan sime darby again. i was supposed to be happy and excited all about the assessment. the truth was, i am not. i was more to frustration and anxious. ive got no idea whether should i go or not go for this so-called 3rd level assessment at Grand Dorsett Subang Jaya. in which i had to again request for holidays in plkn to come all the way to kl. it was again a waste of money. flight tickets, accommodation, transport and all. when i told my mum saying i do not feel like going. she said why not trying?

so here i am, in della's room, playing with her laptop. she's out to college, studying. the assessment was yesterday morning. it was not good, for me. i do not put any high hopes on this. the morning i was supposed to be in a taxi, the taxi services called and said sorry miss, there's no taxi available. then i was stunned WHAT? you do not have a taxi?! i called the day before and wanted a cab!. she apologized and said she'll try again. and yeah, finally there's a taxi nearby. i got to the hotel early, around 7.30 when the assessment started at around 8 something. so i went into the discussion room which was also the waiting room. there's no one there. so i waited and waited. one by one, the other candidates came and yeap, bonding time!!

task 1 presentation.

individual task. extracted key information from the case study given and presented to the assessor. it went well alright. but there's a question i go, um.. um.. sorry, i had no idea. the assessor stared at me for a while and continued to scribble in her notes! i was like, OH NO!!!!!! ahh, well who cares.

task 2 group discussion.

same as the 2nd assessment that we did before. were given a case study and decide which plant are the best one for closure and propose the main issues and solutions for it. this one was quite alright.

task 3 roleplay.

which was the hardest!! individual task as well. me as susan lim the human resources executive will have a meeting with mr. john tan, a production manager from singapore which was played by other assessor. i was SPEECHLESS! ugh! cant believe i went through it.

it was no thrill. after task 3, i feel like going home. T.T all the business tasks really freaked me out. but at least im having fun with all the shopping and outings! :D

ive been staying at della's place for 4 days 3 nights. get to know her housemates and coursemates. all were really nice and friendly.were really kind to help me watch out for the house's owner. it was a funny scene..! we also went out with crystal and others since we had not meet each other since jan, ate shabu shabu buffet. nice nice. i might go to alla's college later, for she still has classes and im not doing anything here. == and im going back on 5th june. okay a few pictures. :)

at the hotel.

nicole and jackie!

and i realised we had not taken any pictures together for a long time!! :)

p.s. thanks for letting me to stay at your place!! a million thanks! :)

one of a kind

2010-05-08T22:37:00.006-04:00

it's been a month or more, ive been doing good in plkn. things has turned from worse to great day after day. met a lots of new friends, having fun with each other. till today, some had already gone for further studies. and when you count the days that is left, it can be saddening. i still remember the first week when i got into the kem. i complained about lotsa things. about the room that i got in was really really far, and the clothes and trousers that they issued were big, shower room that doesnt have the shower plug hole, many many things. it feel suck to live in such a place for months. and now, i couldnt say i love it. it wasnt that amazing and awesome. especially not 'PT pagi'. but it was really a good opportunity for me to learn something and meet new people, experiencing a new different environment.

what i like about plkn. i met a lots of new friends! friends that ive known long time ago, but we never talk to each other. new great people. my roommates that were really helpful and considerate. my great girlfriends in which our friendship bond were stronger than before. and friends that werent chosen for plkn. they were really nice who came all the way into the kem to visit us. it was gratifying. also the thursday and friday christian fellowship. im looking forward to it every week. thats the place where all the christian worship our Lord. the gathering were awesome. :) and plkn taught me to be independent. i had to do everything by my own. and i have to be really hardworking. to wash my clothes daily, get my laundry when it's raining, make up the bed when i wake up, clean the locker, many things that you would not have to do when your mum is at home. im already missing the moments where we combined all the beds and slept together. and also not having supper eventho we were super hungry because we wants to keep fit! haha not to forget gossiping here and there. XD things i recently did in plkn, gun shooting!!! which was the coolest thing ive ever did. we went to lambir for gun shooting. M16 i guess. forgot whats the model. it was awesome!! i got 26 marks. low for the guys but not bad for a girl. HAHA i even got 3 shots at the 4th Mark. and during program integrasi, i tried dikir barat! it was kinda weird! cause im wearing baju kurung. i should have wore baju melayu. but it turned out quite alright. eventho we din get first for the performance. kembara halangan!! charlie got no. 1! ive passed through monkey bar but dropped at tarzan swing. got wet but it was fun!! there's a lot of fun activities going on in plkn tho,. but there are also things that i do not like in plkn. it's not a one day's story. :)

on the way to church!

my bed and locker. P7B (Charlie)

wanlong!

family's visit

an amazing experience

2010-04-26T20:01:00.005-04:00

finally! i got an invitation to attend yayasan sime darby pre-university scholarship assessment. since ive been rejected by a few of the scholarships that i had applied before. i totally gave up and ready to set a foot for form 6, which i would never make such a decisions if i were the old me. so here, a little bit of a chances to get a scholarship from sime darby! i was in the kem when i got this message from them saying congratulations and all. luckily it was saturday, whr i get back my phone. straightaway i called my cousins and asked her to help to check the email. and yeap, i got it! so mum and aunt arrranged all the letters and air ticket for me to release from the kem earlier. fyi, the assessment was in kuching on 26th April. So, the next morning which is on 25th April, i went home.

i read about sime darby the whole day. the mission, board of directors. i went into recomm and saw a few tips about group discussion, business case study and all. my flight is on 26th April morning, 8.45 a.m. i woke up early the next morning, did a few research and headed to the airport after breakfast. my dad accompanied me to kuching. 9.30a.m. my uncle picked us up and went for another breakfast. we reached a friend of my dad's house after that and i changed my clothes and ready to go.

once i reached riverside majestic hotel, it was very nice of the bellboy to open the car door for me. :) i went up to level 3 and saw a few of people dressed up office attire. they were also the candidates, that had finished their assessment. i went into the room and bonnie was there since 8 oclock. i chat with him for a while and went for register. he was getting ready to go for the assessment at 11 oclock. mine's in the noon, 12.00. i sat down in front and have a talk with a few of the girls. before i could realised, it was my turn. me and my group waited outside the door, saying how nervous we were at the moment. not long, bonnie and his group came out and i get a few tips from him. we were in the room, cold! and the accessor started to brief us. we were given a case study and were asked to read the passage and answer the questions for 10 mins. it was a long long passage! 10 mins over and the accessor shouted start which means we were given 30 mins for discussion. there was a 3 seconds of silence, so i took the initiative to start the conversation, but then i gave the wrong statement! ahh well, then Ida the girl sat beside me also started to state her opinions. then the whole group joined the conversation. it was all about Harley Davidson brand, sales and all business thingy. we did it less than 30 min for the accessor announced that we had given enough evidence and so we stopped.

wow, it was such a relief! hmm, i guess it went well alright. i mean, there are ppl that did better than me. so, it was all up to God's will. and after we got back to another room, whr we assemble i asked bonn to take a few pictures of my groupmates. then we went separate ways, bonn followed me and my dad to eat lunch with my uncles and aunt, we went the spring! bought cute fans! haha! and it was all a new experience for me. i met great people, enjoyed the assessment, it was fun actually to give out opinions and discuss with them. like a meeting among the youngsters. except that all we were talking about is profit, marketing, factors and stuff. i wish my groupmates all the best and i hope to see you in kl!

thanks dad for accompanied me.

unsolved

2010-04-04T00:48:00.002-04:00

decisions after another., left undecided. all of them were too good to be true. questions left unanswered. suggestions were everywhere. i hate the world for being so realistic. sometimes, the load and burden is so heavy that i dont think it can be removed and i get so weary. somehow, i wish things could move on slowly. it's all a struggle. nothing is done. in fact, i am still waiting for the impossible. stuff happened and it is not as easy as you think. but the thing is i shouldnt complain! I believe, time will tell. O Lord, please take away our load and give us the rest you promised. have faith.

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and i will give you rest."

matthew 11:28

btu

2010-03-22T07:03:00.012-04:00

another usual day in bintulu. and it turned out to be quite a happy day. at first i saw this van with 'WEN' on it! i was super excited that i screamed in the car. my cousins were shocked and thought something bad happened. we were on the traffic light, and i quickly used my phone camera and snap snap snap before the traffic light turned green. not long i felt a sudden cold behind and beside me. they were staring at me with blur and annoyed face. they said they saw this van a few times already. i was a bit disappointed because it was on a 'van'. it was supposed to be on some mustang or mercedes or blah. ha! i was just joking. =.= but it's okay, the first time i saw car plat number with 'wen' on it wad. LOL if only i could have that plat number. nice. then the second thing is, i bought a book. some sort of gothic horror it costs me around 34++ T.T ive read a few chapters and it's worth it. :)

look! 'WEN'

i was like quick quick! kuai dian kuai dian!! because the traffic light turned green!

braces free

2010-03-17T23:18:00.008-04:00

say cheese..! yeap, i have taken off the braces. and =.= i still have no idea how to smile with my teeth! awkward awkward. it feels really weird and empty. and it's so funny that i kept cleaning my teeth where i used to do after eat because all the food would stucked in between the braces gap. now, there's this retainer that i need to wear full time for about 3 months! hmm, im going ns anyway, so it's okay i guess? but there's this notes given saying swallowing and talking may seem a bit awkward at first. For a day or two, your mouth may be slightly sore! Over-the-counter pain killers can help. =.= but i'll get a great looking teeth for the rest of my life. LOL.

mum's going china again. and i had to go back btu to take care of the shop. i'll come back on the 23rd tho to have my driving test! it's on 24th!! wish me luck! and soon, i'll be going for ns at sungai rait, miri. luckily, wanlong and yiiksiang got the same batch and places together with me. but owh no!! im gonna lost contact with the world for months! im so gonna get a letter from the principal to get me out from there asap!. plus im frust about the plkn letter that is stuck on the way to my house. still hasnt arrived yet!

Thank You

2010-03-10T22:47:00.006-05:00

it had been a heart racing and pounding moment since 10th march. the school hall was filled with tenseness, emotional feelings. and when everyone got their results, there's laughter and tears. some people were just remained neutral. some were ecstatic. but one thing is certain- we all felt relieved. I'm satisfied with what i got. I told myself I did a job well done!. God has answered my prayers. and thank You for always be there whenever i needed You. this is just the beginning, i still have a long way to go.

ps: ops chai! i stole your picture. ;P

无奈

2010-03-09T03:28:00.006-05:00

有的时候微笑是来做掩饰的。掩饰那伤痛，疲累，和无奈。每个人都有他的情绪吧而我的呢是很善变的我很常搞不懂我自己在想些什么。应该是说我常常想很多。太多了，多到我快要被淹没了快要透不过气来了第100次我告诉我自己说没那么复杂很简单的无所谓啦事情不过如此并不是事情是要经得起考验的。我们的未来，家人，学业，友谊，等等。有些事情我真的看透了，看透了所有的人事物对好多事情包括我自己都很无奈所以每当我想起这些事时，我头就要爆炸了天啊我该如何是好。

cant sleep.

2010-03-01T10:41:00.005-05:00

im having insomnia lately, been a lil depressed. i cant bring myself to bed early. and i would wake up really late. barely talk to anyone nowadays for parents are away and brother's working everyday. im all alone at home. but i'm fine. did literally nothing these days because cny's over. ah for cny, we went out last few days for the last time during public holiday. went to parkson, vincent's and simon's. again, mahjong time! all of us were addicted to mahjong ei? and simon's place is really a nice place to chill out. heh.

had nothing to do in the middle of the night, so some sketches.. not a good one tho.

the boys playing basketball. it was really nice watching them playing bball. and i could see the strong friendship bond between them and im glad that we can still be good friends eventhough all these yrs we have not keep in touch with each other. you can see from the stage of not knowing each others' name to the stage where they can hug and jokes around. haha! i actually had a nice video.. but then i cant transfer it to the computer because i don have the cables. sorry guys. :/

cny

2010-02-22T10:15:00.012-05:00

now everyone's back to work, back to school and back to those normal days. where i eat, sleep, and stay at home all day long. there's a new activity though, which is driving lessons. =.= from time to time, im always reminded that the day we awaits is drawing near! i still cant give them an exact answer when they asked what do you wanna do after this. hmm. anyway, back to cny! a week of cny is over! had a great reunion dinner and fireworks on new year eve. and visiting to lotsa friends' house. woo, i can say we had went to many places huh. this year was actually the year i learned how to gamble. heh. poker, blackjack, mahjong... fuhyohh, you name it. :D nah, i din join them.. and when i think of it, celebrate cny in miri was not bad too. get to hang out with friends that i have not seen for such a looong time. but it gets boring sometimes.. that i had to borrow dvd from friend to spend the day. hah! watching hkdrama recently. almost went out everyday until around midnight since the first day. honestly, it's kinda tiring.! but we had fun! next stop is liew's right? :)

cute little boy. :D

oh! stupid thing happened today. i went to 'hot cross bun' with my dad at lunch time. when got down from the car i saw a familiar face, but i was not close to him. so i tried being friendly and smiled. he was in the bakery. when my dad opened the door, it was not the guy i know!! it was somebody else. a stranger! and maybe he thought i flirted with him so he smiled back, devilishly. i was stunned and do not dare to enter the shop so i stayed outside. he came out! he whistled and stood beside me, i was so damn scared and did not face him. i pretended that i was busy with the phone. luckily my dad came out from the shop then i quickly ran into the car. cant believe i did such a stupid thing! :( i should wear a glasses!

i miss

2010-02-09T21:28:00.007-05:00

i miss the celebration of cny ages ago when i was little. where all families would set a date and go back to sibu together. where we had to reserve for an extra large, huge tables for reunion dinner. the moments when we all could chit chat for non-stop until the restaurant's closed. where we, the children lined up in front of the adults, forced to say 10 different blessings before taking 'angpau'. the adults would play mahjong and the kids would play 'yu ha he', firecrackers 'chi li hua'. also, where we would live at grandma's house or auntie's flat before they were sold and rented by someone else. a few families would live there and two rooms is always never enough so we slept on the sofa, on the floor and etc. it was so so fun back then. which made me super excited when it comes to cny. yeah, i miss it so much. :(

i jogged!

2010-02-07T07:45:00.011-05:00

i learned driving last friday! back in miri just for that. yeah, and it was kinda scary!! im just not used to the gears. but overall i did okay, i guess. next lesson is tmr! right. ive been taking care of my uncle's shop in btu. he went somewhere so gotta go back and help. working is boring. plus there's nothing in the shop except for the fishing thing. my mum's and aunt's were nearby, so i would walked here and there. bored. am going back again this tuesday? no clue. cny's next week! on the same day of valentine's day. but i don seem to care about valentine. hah. single ba. anyhow, i might be celebrating cny in miri. but i still wish that all of my families could all go back to sibu and gather there. that would be like super cool and super awesome. hmm.

oh! i went to bulatan park today! i don know why and how. i felt like exercising and it was just the right time! it was about 5.30pm. so, i quickly changed and asked my dad to send me to the park. alone, i listened to the mp3 while i jogged. it was tiring! then i realised it had been a looong time since i exercised. i spent around 45 minutes non-stop walking and jogging around the park. beh ta han!! not long, i called my dad and went back straightaway. i hope it did burned a few calories? i was thinking of going again tmr? HAH i doubt it. depends on my mood. ;)

so long.

2010-01-30T02:06:00.004-05:00

another best friend's leaving this afternoon, back to perth. we had fun this time and it was really nice having you here back in miri. spent a great time sleeping over at your house tho. i bet you bu she de also. haha! anyway, good luck in striving your dreams and God bless you. have a safe trip back to perth and am gonna miss you so much! keep in touch, take care and byebye! Sarah Soo Ee. :D

old friends

2010-01-23T23:58:00.013-05:00

wow, it's been a long time since i met these old primary buddies. we've been hanging out quite alot these few days. and it was memorable!!! :) we had a great time talking and joking around with each other. went to lotsa places and had fun! went to movies, ee's house sleepover, dinner, playing poker at della's hse until midnight and more. yeah, these memories shall be kept forever. because after this whole spm result thing comes out, we've gotta go our own way to different school and colleges. eventhough all of us were in miri now, we dont hang out that often anymore. it shows how easily things can change when you leave it just like that. So long, Amos. Till we meet again. :)

sibu

2010-01-17T10:30:00.003-05:00

heyo, it's been ages since i update my blog. haha! been away from home since last few weeks.. went to kl! i had FUN! thanks to kl friends for bringing us around and all. :) came back on the 13th. then straightaway go btu and all the way to sibu on the 15th to attend my cousin's wed. yeap, bridesmaid again! :) this time was tiring!!! but fun at the same time. din took alot of pictures this time. because mich werent there to accompany me. T.T haha!

time

2009-12-29T09:21:00.004-05:00

christmas' over, birthday's over... coming up is new year.. woow, time really flies... anyway, not in miri currently, will be back on 31st or 1st.. so, missed out alot of friends gatherings.. yeah.. especially when a friend of mine YYY is moving to sabah soon. good luck to him in everything he do and God bless him. take care alright.. :) which means, we wont be able to meet each other that often anymore.. hmm, i guess we experience parting when we grow up. things changed eventually i guess.

lets see, what ive been doing last few days. went to sibu and attended my cousin's wedding.. God bless the lovely couple. and then, yeah, celebrate my bday with my big family. parents, aunts, uncles, cousins, grandma... ahha! nvr been like this before. and it was... good! went back to btu again, plan to stay here until 31st. oh oh! im going to kl next week! cant wait!!! gonna have fun fun fun and FUN! :D

a camp to remember

2009-12-22T04:14:00.007-05:00

church graduation camp. this, shall be the last camp for the year and it also marks the end of my secondary school life. we, the graduates will be making decisions on the path that we will be taking for our future and it is really important that the path that we take shall be leading by our Lord. We must seek for His help and trust Him that He will guides us through obstacles and difficulties. We must continue to find the true self and have determination to not easily give up. This is what ive learned through this camp. it has been really meaningful to me to know all this because i want to hold His hand and follow Him to the right and correct road. and so, i would not look back and only Him will catches my eyes. thank You for bringing me to this camp and get to know all the christian graduates that have the same mission... okay, a few pictures.!

i wish y'all a merry christmas!

trying a hand on drumset. nice! ps: wanlong's the teacher

this, morning exercise? LOL

'康乐' games. NISSAN NISSAN 碰到我们你惨你惨! we got no.1! XD

group photo!

i'll definitely miss the camp and the people there. i wanna know more about them and of course would like to meet them again. i bet we will.. :) it was a great camp because it made me think a lot. i mean ALOT! all sorts of things... by sharing our thoughts and feelings in front of all the people was a great thing to do. i realised, all of us have the same problems and weakness. the road in front of us is indeed blurry and cowardice. what i want to say is, hold on tight to God and believe that He will lead you to the life that He wants you to be.

back

2009-12-22T02:59:00.004-05:00

*ahem ahem* since someone's very interested, so im updating my blog.. HAHA XD anyway, went back to btu last last week. stayed there for around a week. helped my mum to look out for the store and went to GGIFA. bored. and ugh! what a disappointment. after hearing what the officer said, i don think i can study pilot aviation in msia. which means im forced to study the course in other countries that accept female pilots. felt frustrated, anger, anxiety all sorts of feelings.. so, im doing my best to figure things out and try my best in order to make things work. so pray for me.. and i hope i can make it.

a day

2009-12-10T05:30:00.006-05:00

FINALLY! im done with SPM. IT'S OVER! did my best so hopefully the result will not be too devastating. haha! but, i am very sure that i'll miss all the memories in high school. it's significant!. anyway, wat should i do after form 5?! i don have a specific plan! it scare me sometimes, that i really do not know what should i do and where i should be. so, pray for all the best to the dreams that i want to achieve.

anyway, went out to parkson with a bunch of friends today and there's an event, "ONE LIFE, DO SOMETHING". it's about HIV/AIDS. i think everyone should go and support that event. listen to their story, giving donations, write notes and all. they gave bracelet after the event, and donate rm10 u got a slipper and donate rm20 a t-shirt. the event is on until 13th dec at bintang megamall if im not mistaken. so ppl, experience it yourself and maybe it will change you and HIV patients' life.